"This is the most important up-date you will read.
"Shipmates,
How could I have an up-date now you might ask...
"Well, I actually got this information confirmed about nine months ago. I waited to see if you really needed to know this and now I think you do.
"A lot of you have marked my utter lack of surprise at any announcement made by the owners of the ship, especially the ones relating to mission extensions. I'm not surprised because I know this mission will last at least three full years. That's a prophesy from God. I'm telling you this so you can adjust your expectations. Some of you may need to bail soon. Some of you really need to stop thinking and enjoy the ride.
"Note: if They put us back on double missions then they have to feed us. "Free" food = party. It's all in our attitude. I, for one, advocate silliness and am looking forward to it.
"On a related note: Spirit Sunday schedule will be available on Google calendars if you want in let me know. We'll be starting early with a high-five competition."